These times are difficult to manage. In the past three months, our home care agency has spent an enormous amount of time contacting patients on a daily basis to see how they are coping with these tragic times. During our review, we recognized a pattern of concerns from family members especially parents who are concerned about
What makes the situation difficult is when you recognize that an older loved one may need the assistance. It’s harder to admit the truth to your parents that they might not be able to handle a situation alone. For most of our lives, our parents are our main caretakers until they older. When the situation is reserved, the transition is not always a smooth one. This does not necessarily mean that our parents don’t have a choice, but we want to ensure that their health is put at the top of the priority list.
While not every case is the same, these are some suggestions I’d recommend when discussing home care with parents.
Be Supportive
In this transition period, being supportive can make a difference. The emotional support is a big component to the transition. I try to remind clients to place themselves in their parents shoes. This can help them understand better as to why their parents may or may not want services. It is natural for an older adult to maintain their independence as long as possible. The drastic change can create friction or problems if it is not handled properly. However, by being concerned for their well being and having them understand that it’s important for them to continue being independent, then the change can be more accepted. A home health aide isn’t intrusive. They monitor and support, but they don’t get involved unnecessarily.
It’s for Their Well Being
I tell families constantly that they should remind their loved ones that they are genuinely concerned for their well being. There are families that leave out the heartfelt elements as to why they feel home care services will benefit their loved ones. In addition, they avoid the subject. I’ve seen couples force it on their parents and turn ugly. It shouldn’t be a forced decision. The decision should be mutual and agreed upon. This can be achieved by communicating with sincere intentions for your parents well being. The proper transition can be achieved through genuine, meaningful intentions. Its the intent that is usually the main reason why parents avoid agreeing to home care services.
Independence Can Continue
This is one hundred percent a factor in communicating with parents about home care services. It doesn’t matter how old a parent is. As most of us may be parents, many of us see ourselves as a provider and independent thinker. Could you imagine at one point in your life needing assistance to tie your shoes or eat? It’d be a frustrating turn of events if you needed to rely on others.
When we reach adulthood, its natural that our inclination to be independent is strong. It’s not easy asking people for help. What I tell our families is that independence should be the goal. A home heath aide and a caregiver are available for support. Usually, once parents understand the full responsibilities of a caregiver, they accept the additional help. It makes a big difference.
It’s okay if parents don’t accept the decision right away. These tips can assist you in the transition period though. They’ve helped me reach out to families in need of extra advice. What you should remember is that support services may enable your parents to remain safely at home for an extended period of time.