How To Help a Loved One Who Refuses Care

Do you have a parent or loved one who is need of help refuses to accept any? Maybe your elderly mother will not stop driving or your father who has trouble talking refuses help around the house. This can be difficult because you are watching them struggle yet they will not accept the help. You do not want to force them into a care facility, but you also want them to get the care they need.

 Before trying to force help upon them you may want to try a different approach. It can be stressful to witness but try to put yourself in their position. Once you know what they are feeling and thinking it will be easier for you to find ways to help them with out making them feel bad. These are some ways to approach this:

Talk to Your Loved Ones

Granddaughter talking with her grandmother sitting on wheelchair, cheerful concept, happy family

When your parent or loved one begins to age if the best time to talk about this. You can come up with a plan for care when the time comes for them to need assistance. This helps because if gives them the opportunity to make the choice themselves. While doing so ask a lot of questions so you know exactly what kind of care they would like and how to best go about getting them that care.

Validate Their Feelings and Offer Options

Before overlooking or dismissing their fears hear them out. Maybe they want to remain home and do not want to go to live in a facility because they want to remain independent. Listen to their wants and validate their feelings. By doing so you will make them happy to accept the help.

Talk to a Professional

Sometimes it can be easier for your parent or loved one to hear they need help from some one other than family. You can have their doctor or even a social worker discuss their conditions with them and give them advice on their care.

assisting her senior patient who’s using a walker for support

Approach With Caution and Know Your Limits

  1. You should approach your loved one gently and with caution. This is a sensitive subject for many and if you go about it the wrong way it can make your loved one even more hesitant to accepting care. Slowly introducing a home health aide can help. At first be there all the time when the aide is there so your loved one will feel comfortable around them. Then little by little allow the aide to solely assist them.

Lastly, you are going to need to know your limits. If your senior loved one is in good mental health then let them make the decisions. You should avoid “parenting” your parents and let them make their own choices.

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